


Hufflelump

by bansheee



Category: Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda - Becky Albertalli
Genre: Fluff, Harry Potter References, M/M, POV Bram Greenfeld, The Upside of Unrequited References, post book
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-26
Updated: 2017-06-26
Packaged: 2018-11-19 05:06:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11306286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bansheee/pseuds/bansheee
Summary: “Did you guys just awkwardly sneak away so you could argue about what Harry Potter house I’m in? For two hours?”Simon looked at Bram and Bram felt his cheeks flush.“That’s exactly what we did," Simon said.





	Hufflelump

**Author's Note:**

> _Anonymous asked: Can you write something about Simon and Bram having a movie night_

It started with Simon making a Harry Potter reference, and really, Bram wasn’t surprised by the turn of events.  
  
As rain drowned Shady Creek outside, Bram sat next to Simon and laughed while he stared at Abby. They were in Simon’s basement, and Bram suspected the only reason Simon’s parents allowed him to be over while they were at work was because Nick and Abby were with. “You’ve never seen the Harry Potter movies.” Simon was dumbfounded. “Seriously, Abby, say you’re kidding.”  
  
Bram looked back to Abby.  
  
“I mean, I read a few of the books, but by the time I started them the spoilers were already everywhere. It didn’t seem like –”  
  
“—God help me Abby if you say it wasn’t worth it to read the books, you are no longer my best friend.”  
  
“I thought I was your best friend,” Nick said. He plucked a few cords on Nora’s guitar, and Bram grinned when he recognized the first notes of Hedwig’s Theme.  
  
“I think I watched one of them with my cousin when we were younger,” Abby said, ignoring Nick. She laughed at Simon’s exasperation.  
  
“We’re watching them. Right now.” Simon extracted himself from beside Bram and walked over to the television.  
  
“I thought we were going to Garrett’s,” Nick said. “The Laughlin’s just filled their pool.”  
  
Lightning lit up the tiny basement window, and Simon shot Nick a wry glance. “I think Leah and Garrett will be fine without us.”  
  
“Harry Potter marathon it is,” Nick said. He set Nora’s guitar aside and stood. While Simon set up the television with Sorcerer's Stone, Abby and Nick settled into the other side of the couch. Abby curled up under Nick’s arm.  
  
Simon came back over when the DVD started up, grabbing one of the decorative blankets off of a chair before sitting next to Bram. He draped it over the both of them before settling against Bram’s side.  
  
“Hands above the blanket,” Abby said sternly. Bram felt Simon chuckle against him. He slid his arm from under the blanket and pulled Simon closer to him. When he turned to look at Simon, Simon kissed him.  
  
Simon broke off mid-kiss when the movie started playing. Bram laughed at him.  
  
To his credit, Simon managed to wait until after the title screen before he spoke again. “Oh my God, he’s so little. They’re all so little.”  
  
Abby leaned over and made eye contact with Bram.  
  
“Control him.”  
  
Bram laughed when Simon made a face at her. He pulled Simon closer so he could kiss his cheek. Without pulling back, Bram put his lips against Simon’s ear and whispered, “Is this the Daniel Radcliffe from your dreams?”  
  
He felt Simon laugh shakily. Bram didn’t move his lips away.  
  
“Goblet of Fire Dan,” Simon told him. “It was the hair.”  
  
Bram kissed the soft skin on the back of Simon’s neck. Simon melted against him. Bram wrapped both of his arms around Simon.  
  
The rain continued through the rest of the movie. When they stood to stretch Bram checked his phone. Garrett sent a text in their group chat that the rest of them were no longer invited over, and Leah replied with the emoji that had hands like it was shrugging.  
  
Nick looked up from his phone at the same time and grinned at Bram. “Leah’s going to be pissed we’re marathoning Harry Potter without her.”  
  
Simon chuckled. “She made her choice, it’s not our fault it rained.” He quickly switched out the discs and made his way back over to Bram.  
  
Before Harry and Ron even managed to get to Hogwarts, Bram could tell Simon was getting antsy. Simon tapped his fingers on the back of Bram’s hand and couldn’t figure out how to get comfortable against him.  
  
And really, Simon’s parents should have known better.  
  
Bram shifted so he could kiss Simon on the cheek. “I’ll be right back,” he told them, and started walking towards the stairs. Just as he reached the bottom of the staircase Bram turned back and made eye contact with Simon. He raised an eyebrow at him before making his way up the rest of the stairs.  
  
Bieber greeted him at the top of the staircase and Bram scratched his ears for a second. Bram knelt down and smiled into Bieber’s fur when he heard quick footsteps on the staircase. He stood and turned around when the door handle twisted. Bieber shot down the stairs when Simon opened the door.  
  
Instead of saying anything, Simon greeted him with a hungry kiss. Bram immediately returned it, twisting his fingers into Simon’s shirt. He felt strange kissing Simon so openly in the Spier living room, but Nora was at a friend’s house and Simon’s parents weren’t going to be back until later.  
  
“Did they notice?” Bram asked as Simon kissed down his jaw.  
  
“I don’t care,” Simon replied.  
  
Bram chuckled softly, closing his eyes at the feeling of Simon’s mouth on his neck. “That’s not very Hufflepuff of you.”  
  
Simon made a noise against his neck. “Please keep talking about Harry Potter while I kiss you.”  
  
Simon put his hands on Bram’s sides and pushed him towards the couch, kissing him as they went. Bram felt the back of his knees bump into it, and pulled Simon down with him. Simon put a knee on either side of him.  
  
“Maybe you’re part Slytherin,” Bram whispered in his ear. Simon laughed against his neck, and Bram smiled, feeling light and breathy. He turned so he could kiss Simon. “I guess Abby can take over as the group Hufflepuff.”  
  
Simon pulled back and Bram tried to chase his mouth. Instead, he was met with Simon’s confused expression.  
  
“Abby’s clearly a Gryffindor,” Simon said.  
  
“Clearly, you’ve never seen Abby yell at someone,” Bram said, chuckling at Simon’s expression.  
  
“Yeah, she charges in headfirst and without thinking, like a Gryffindor,” Simon said.  
  
Bram raised an eyebrow. “She does that when she’s defending someone else, like a Hufflepuff.”  
  
“Are we really doing this, Greenfeld?” Simon asked. Bram watched the corner of his mouth quiver with a smile. “Because I don’t know if you realize the crushing defeat you’re going to face when I prove you wrong.”  
  
Bram rolled his eyes. “And here I thought you’d want to spend the time your parents are at work doing more interesting activities,” Bram said, sliding his hands along the hem of Simon’s shirt.

Simon faltered. Bram watched the wheels in his head turn.  
  
“I’m not done with this,” Simon eventually said.  
  
“I didn’t think so,” Bram said, and captured Simon’s mouth in a kiss. He slid his fingers under Simon’s shirt and ran them across Simon’s skin. Simon pushed harder against him.  
  
“I mean,” Simon said, pulling back suddenly, “Gryffindor and Hufflepuff do have similar traits. Like loyalty and doing the right thing.”  
  
Bram dropped his head back against the couch and looked at the ceiling. “Simon.”  
  
“But it’s loyalty for different reasons,” Simon said.  
  
“I’m going to go back and watch the movie,” Bram said, pretending to push Simon off. Simon laughed, and Bram felt him move forward to kiss his jaw. Bram closed his eyes and got lost in the feeling of Simon’s mouth on his neck. He put his hands back on Simon and rolled their hips together. Simon exhaled sharply and copied the action. Soon all Bram could focus on was the feeling of Simon’s mouth on his and the sound of his sharp and shaky breathing.  
  
Bram didn’t get Simon all to himself like this very often. If they weren’t hanging out with their friends, his mom or Simon’s parents were hovering close by. There was only so much you could do when the bedroom door had to be open. Bram was pretty sure there was one time that Simon’s parents made Nora babysit them.  
  
Not that it stopped them from trying.  
  
He blamed that on why he had to pull back from Simon much, much sooner than he wanted. Simon leaned over and rested his forehead on Bram’s shoulder, breathing heavily against his collarbone. His glasses were cold against Bram’s cheek. Bram turned his head so he could kiss Simon’s temple. He could feel Simon’s pulse race under his lips. Simon shifted so he could kiss Bram’s neck, and Bram squeezed his sides.  
  
“Simon.”  
  
Simon sighed and sat up. “My room is right upstairs. One staircase.”  
  
“And our friends are right downstairs,” Bram said.  
  
“There is no way Chamber of Secrets is still playing. They would be up here right now if they weren’t doing the same exact thing.”  
  
Bram looked to his lap. “And just like that I don’t even want to.” Simon snorted. He gave Bram another kiss and dropped on the couch next to him. Simon laid back and put his legs in Bram’s lap, and Bram rested his hands on them.  
  
“I think Abby is pretty fearless,” Simon said after a moment. Bram turned to him. “Like, do you remember that time I told you about when she and Taylor Metternich went after those guys at rehearsal?”  
  
Bram clenched his jaw. “Yeah.” Bram had History class with one of the guys that was responsible for that.  
  
“She didn’t even hesitate when she ran off. She didn’t care that she could have gotten in trouble right along with those guys, she just went for it.”  
  
Bram smiled. “I’m glad you had her there. I remember how sad you looked that day.”  
  
“I remember how cute you looked in a turtleneck,” Simon replied with a grin.  
  
Bram shook his head, laughing. “Okay, Soccer Auditions.” Simon threw his arm over his eyes and laughed.  
  
Bram looked up when the door to the basement opened.  
  
“There you are,” Abby said. “The movie’s been over for a while.”  
  
“And they just decided to find us now,” Simon said to Bram. Bram grinned at him. Nick and Abby both had the decency to look embarrassed, but before either of them could answer, Simon asked, “Nick, Abby is clearly a Gryffindor and not a Hufflepuff, right?”  
  
Nick looked from Simon to Bram. “I am not getting involved in whatever this is.”  
  
Simon sighed. “Abby, text your cousin. The cool one.”  
  
“Molly?” Abby asked. “Did you guys just awkwardly sneak away so you could argue about what Harry Potter house I’m in? For two hours?”  
  
Simon looked at Bram and Bram felt his cheeks flush.  
  
“That’s exactly what we did,” Simon said.  
  
Abby rolled her eyes. “Unbelievable.” She pulled out her phone and tapped out a text message. A moment later she said, “Molly is going to Skype me in a little bit.”  
  
While they waited for Abby’s cousin to call, Bram followed Simon into the kitchen. Simon grabbed each of them a water bottle and fished a small stack of Oreos out of their cupboard. Bram smiled when he handed him half of them.  
  
“Gotta have sugar if I’m not having sex,” Simon said offhandedly, twisting one of the cookies apart. He glanced up at Bram and smiled.  
  
Bram rolled his eyes. “You’ll live.”  
  
“Simon, get out here, Molly’s calling!” Abby called from the living room.  
  
“I’ll be back for victory kisses,” Simon said, pressing a quick, chocolatey kiss to Bram’s cheek. He ran off and Bram followed him, carrying Simon's abandoned Oreos.  
  
Simon was pressed into the smaller chair with Abby when he got in the room, so Bram sat on the couch next to Nick.  
  
“Leah texted,” Nick said. “They’re in the pool and Garrett’s phone keeps playing country music. She’s threatening to break up with him if we don’t get over there and take away his music privileges.”  
  
Bram laughed and looked outside; the sun was just starting to peek through the clouds. He glanced at Simon and Simon’s eyes flicked up to him. Simon shot him a playful smile before looking back to Abby’s phone.  
  
“He probably deserves it,” Bram told Nick. Nick grinned and typed that into the group chat. When they looked up from Nick’s phone, Simon was standing in front of them grinning.  
  
Bram held up his hands. “Simon Spier, I promise I will never, ever question your knowledge of Harry Potter again.”  
  
“You know, for a Ravenclaw it took you a pretty long time to figure that out,” Simon said. He glanced at Nick. “So we’re going to Garrett’s to save Leah?”  
  
Nick chuckled. “I think we’re saving Garrett.”  
  
Simon and Bram finished their Oreos while Abby talked on Skype. When Abby finished her conversation with her cousin, Nick realized he didn’t have his iPod, and he and Abby left to make a stop at Nick’s house.  
  
Bram glanced at Simon as he shut the door behind him. Simon raised an eyebrow at him, and Bram grinned.  
  
Simon grinned back and took off up the stairs, and Bram was right behind him.  
  
They didn’t make it to Garrett’s.

**Author's Note:**

> [my tumblr](http://cutebramgreenfeld.tumblr.com) if you wanna say hi or send me fic ideas.


End file.
